Monday, November 18, 2013

The Doctor. The Accountant. The Lawyer.

As you might guess it takes a team of people to help manage Mom's new life. Luckily my brother and his wife are one hundred percent in it with me. Each of us has taken on a role. I do not know what people do that have life altering medical issues with no family support.

My brother has become the medicet specialist (the Doctor). He makes sure all of the prescriptions are in order, filled and actually dropped into the two plastic medicet's at Mom's house. He stops by every few days and makes sure everything is in order. My sister-in-law has taken all of Mom's bills and expenses and put them online so she can pay all her bills and manage her finances (the Accountant). I tend to make a lot of the doctor's calls, listen to their diagnosis, help to initiate and collaborate on what is "next" for her, and help to consult with the Agency we hired to help care for Mom (the Lawyer).

However Mom's point of view is this. The other day while my brother and I were consulting with the Agency on her care, she said to the Owner, "My Son, is great! He is a Do-er! He gets things done. He tells me what to do, and I do it". So the owner says, well then what does your daughter do? There was a long pause. "Well, she is a great caretaker. She is a Mom".  The owner kind of gave me a smile and said "Oh gosh, I know she owns her own business, so I am guessing she does more than just take care of her children". I chuckled. She was right about one thing, I am a Mom, and I love being one, but people that know me — know that would not be the first description they would give me.

Mom continues to have her rose colored glasses on. She wants me to be a Mom, not a lawyer or an Agency owner. This is a metaphor for my life growing up; she always was very proud of me, but I was never convinced she really "got me". I mean I think she sees me how she wants to see me versus who I truly was. Some things don't change. It's ok though, I don't hold it against her.

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