Monday, November 18, 2013

I Dont' Want a Funeral

Mom was admitted to the hospital. They did all kinds of tests and concluded she had severe Edema and that she was "sundowning". I had never heard the term "sundowning" before but once I stared talking with girlfriends that also had been down a journey of taking care of older loved ones I learned more about it.

Mom use to cry over spilled milk. She was very emotional. The last thing she ever would want was to see me or my brother cry. I visited her in the hospital the next day and she was like a different person. In a weird way. My intuition told me that her behavior was not normal. She went on to tell me that she did not want a funeral. She wanted to be buried next to "Daddy" and we should only invite the immediate family. She would have never spoken of such a sad topic due to her obsession with privacy. I of course could not hold in my tears any longer, and started to cry. In the past, this would have made her completely upset to see me upset, but today she just looked into my eyes with a blank stare and offered me a kleenex. She never was the same.

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